We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
