oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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