You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
