That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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