I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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