R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
