My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
