shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
