white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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