I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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