I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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