i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I understand Curling. That high.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
