Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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