oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
