So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Success! We fucked roommates!
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
