Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
