allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
