Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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