I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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