just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
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