i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
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