yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
