my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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