The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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