I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
