this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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