Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize