dude i'm inner monologue high
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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