just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
