yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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