waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
