Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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