The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
