Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
