He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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