Moan for me like Helen Keller
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
