Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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