I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
