But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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