What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
