Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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