what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize