She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
