he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
