Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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