It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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