we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
This baby is an asshole
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
