he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
