you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
