I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
